you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
We fish bowled my car and anna told us a story about time travel and part of it had people melted into the side of a boat and i imagined them being melted into my car moaning in pain and then we got scared and thought zombies were outside and couldn't leave for a while.
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
Thank you for deleting me from Instagram. Also, I'm carrying your child. Happy new year!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
So I just accidentally joined a bar crawl and got a free shotski of Jameson. I love life.
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