my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
We have been pregaming the shutdown of the government since Tuesday. Send help, and some more liquor.
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
You had the genius idea to tape beer to the celing fan. There goes his security deposit. He is gonna be fuckin pissed.
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
I just used the proceeds from selling my ex's engagement ring to fund my first date with another girl.
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
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