just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
This cougar at my work just said "big breasts" referring to poultry... Still resulted in a boner.
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
Spent 30 minutes in the board meeting trying to figure out where the foul smell was coming from. Thought it was the guy's feet sitting next to me. Then i uncrossed my legs. Turns out it was my vagina. Thank goodness for travel size febreeeze.
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
My vibrator broke.
Dude it's been less than twelve hours. Did you sleep?
Don't worry about that. I need a new vibrator.
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