Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(269): View more from Michigan

We have a vodka soaked ShamWow with your name on it.

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(269): We have a vodka soaked ShamWow with your name on it. http://tfl.nu/t2uq

Replies (9) Good night (3756) Bad night (618)
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(403): View more from Alberta, CA

Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.

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(403): Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice. http://tfl.nu/ol36

Replies (10) Good night (3481) Bad night (1018)
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(212): View more from New York

we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy

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(212): we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy http://tfl.nu/2r3y

Replies (6) Good night (2804) Bad night (1649)
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(973): View more from New Jersey

Do you remember anything yesterday that led to needing a cup of couscous in my closet?

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(973): Do you remember anything yesterday that led to needing a cup of couscous in my closet? http://tfl.nu/ol6s

Replies (6) Good night (1857) Bad night (1169)
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(217): View more from Illinois

who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?

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(217): who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo? http://tfl.nu/900o

Replies (4) Good night (2232) Bad night (850)
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(801): View more from Utah

If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...

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(801): If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy... http://tfl.nu/s54g

Replies (14) Good night (3808) Bad night (767)
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(334): View more from Alabama

Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?

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(334): Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is? http://tfl.nu/g1vx

Replies (7) Good night (2775) Bad night (808)
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(774): View more from Massachusetts

Fucked Zombie Jesus at a Halloween party. I need Plan B before I give birth to the Antichrist.

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(774): Fucked Zombie Jesus at a Halloween party. I need Plan B before I give birth to the Antichrist. http://tfl.nu/bzfc

Replies (9) Good night (3839) Bad night (1266)
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(602): View more from Arizona

The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.

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(602): The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier. http://tfl.nu/l0xp

Replies (3) Good night (1045) Bad night (467)
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(919): View more from North Carolina

so my mom thinks I'm picking you up just to go buy you liquor before you go back to school tomorrow...

(1-919): View more from North Carolina

I'm ashamed that your mom thinks I haven't already taken care of that.

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(919): so my mom thinks I'm picking you up just to go buy you liquor before you go back to school tomorrow... (1-919): I'm ashamed that your mom thinks I haven't already taken care of that. http://tfl.nu/ee0c

Replies (0) Good night (1812) Bad night (419)
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(304): View more from West Virginia

I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?

(1-304): View more from West Virginia

Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.

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(304): I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay? (1-304): Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime. http://tfl.nu/2vyh

Replies (6) Good night (1463) Bad night (343)
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(562): View more from California

Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.

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(562): Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight. http://tfl.nu/c5kp

Replies (4) Good night (722) Bad night (380)
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(805): View more from California

fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King

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(805): fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King http://tfl.nu/soey

Replies (2) Good night (278) Bad night (704)
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(616): View more from Michigan

The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.

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(616): The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time. http://tfl.nu/wo2i

Replies (4) Good night (556) Bad night (208)
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(605): View more from South Dakota

I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.

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(605): I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help. http://tfl.nu/advt

Replies (0) Good night (209) Bad night (151)

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