if you are receiving this text, you are one of the people i hate
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
The worst mistakes make the best memories. Write that down.
The bouncer asked you what your sign was and u replied "syracuse"
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
I literally just woke up in a dog bed, in a bathtub in someone else's house...and I'm not wearing pants
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
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