Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
HEAR YE, HEAR YE! BY ROYAL DECREE, I WILL BE KNOCKING ON YOUR DOOR AT 2PM UNLESS YOU GET THE FUCK UP. IT'S 1:50. CIGARETTE TIME, BITCH. I LOVE YOU.
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
The feeling I get when I hear beer bottles clinking must be what children feel when they hear sleigh bells on Christmas Eve
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
Pro: 2020 made it easier to hook up with strippers
Con: explaining to Kari why there’s always strippers at our house
Pro: there’s always strippers at our house
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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