I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
nothing like a call from your drunk grandpa at midnight on a wednesday to ask your parents if you're registered to vote...
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
The only person who DOESN'T think it's a horrible idea to sleep with my ex is my therapist. Obviously I trust her judgement above all others.
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
Randomize
