What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
I'm going to write a book about John. It's going to be called big dreams, little dick
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
i'm gonna friendzone myself so you dont have to
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
Randomize
