Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
I'm so high I have morphed into the monopoly man. Or maybe the Pringles guy. I don't know but I have a mustach now
Randomize
