hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
Next time when I try to seductively eat onion rings while drunk remind me of tonight.
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
God, you're amazing. I just want to hang out with you in the nude and watch Monty Python movies whilst we quip about how comedians just aren't as funny anymore.
Credit for originality. Points off for a mild to moderate creepy factor.
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
Randomize
