Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
I just saw a girl walk by me wearing a "kiss me I'm pro choice" shirt. Is that a signal for easy access?
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
just like fucking own it. stare that cop in the eye and just keep masturbating "yeah motherfucker Im high as shit and this feels great"
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
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