first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
We can add pilot to the list of people who's lives I've changed...with my penis.
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
She's just so happy...and so naked.
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
Randomize
