Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
If we worried less about pouring champagne down stripper crack, we probably wouldn't skip so many meals.
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
Who knew you could get a drunk in public when jogging with your dog?
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
Can you bring home an IV stand and an empty bag so I can direct inject coffee for work tomorrow morning?
So there is a 50% chance that he just left my house and a 100% chance that I have to be up for work in 2 hours...
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
one of my coworkers asked me if I was PMSing today...... excuse me sir, but it is none of your business as to what my uterus is or is not doing right now. fucker.
and yea, I'm PMSing.
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize
