ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
It wasn't a basement apartment, it's his parents basement. And he wanted to show me his pet tarantula collection. I NOPED THE FUCK OUT!
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
Welcome to my Tuesday when my lesbian ex girlfriend shows up unexpectedly and gets me drunk and then leaves
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
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