ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
The best thing happened. Some guy was butchering Conway Twitty at karoke and the power went off in the whole bar. And someone shouted "you pissed jesus off when you messed with conway!"
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
He asked me where I wanted it. I told him in the condom. He stops mid thrust and says "you're no fun" and then blew. Chivalry is semi dead.
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize
