Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
Just saw my boss eat a banana in three bites.
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
You are the only one who would stop a bum, tell him to open up, then pour straight vodka in his mouth. You made his year.
He scratched off my spray tan. Literal nail marks down my back. Can't imagine what's underneath his fingernails.
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
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