What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
Ordered a large pizza and definitely just paid the cab driver in pizza slices. I'm glad there's someone out there that's just as fat at heart as we are.
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
Randomize
