You were right. It hurts to walk today.
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
there was a sad and surprising lack of "did strippers and blow" in that sentence
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
Everyone is sleeping and i'm sittin here in my iron man mask, watchin chelsea lately and tryin to figure out how to smoke through it.
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
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