Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
It feels like I shit a light bulb that shattered on the way out.
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
He ended our Skype call with, "I'm going to poop and then go play my ukulele in the park."
Well there's a microwave in my yard now too. I fucking Bruce/Caitlyn Jennered decathloned that bitch.
I don't know when he had the time to do it but he dug a hole in our basement like the shawshank redemption
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Randomize
