and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
We thought we were getting kicked out but then he started tickling the bouncer. Next thing you know the bouncers giving him a piggy back ride to the bar.
for the record, you never really realize how drunk you still are until you get on rollerskates...
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
She made me walk a straight line to prove i was sober enough to help carry you to the car
Knowing you it was perfect out of spite. Like. A line straighter than YOU
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
I was drunk and on Craigslist.. The drunk-text offers people got must have been either horrifying or glorious
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
Like, my vagina is jet-lagged.
Randomize
