i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
Do you think if I drink bleach they will let me leave work?
i wish peter jackson would direct porn
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed.
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
Rolled in at 3:30am from the strip club, with all the screaming I did, Siri doesn't even recognize my voice this morning,
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
The drag queen you used to date and the girl you brought over last night are discussing your sex noises in my living room. I'm changing my locks.
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
Randomize
