This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
When i woke up this morning she asked me 'when did you first find out that you could see the future.' I gotta stop drinking.
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
I made that picture of you my lock screen. So I've just been standing around at work licking my phone all day.
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
I showed up to a job interview wearing two different shoes. If that's not an omen, I don't know what is.
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
Randomize
