when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
Happy anniversary, did you sign and mail in the divorce papers yet?
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
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