I'm pretty sure I have jizz on the back of the dress I wore to church. Awesome.
when "blow-job jen" drunk dials you at 3 in the morning, you answer
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
I woke up and watched my kitten suck on his nipple. Way too hungover to intervene. He thought it was me, so he just giggled and mumbled "mmm girl."
Seriously? God I hope he wasn't lactating.
......... Poor kitty
woke up to see a man wearing a sailor hat and covered in vomit sneaking out the door. Epic night indeed.
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
I'll just tell your children you were the queen of drunk town and you had a giant purple monkey named bongo
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
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