did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
Level of drunkenness: just now when I sat down on the toilet, I had to double check to make sure I wasn't sitting on somebody's lap.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
The last mom I slept with was the worst lay ever. Imagine fucking a hairy wet pillow for 60 minutes. Good luck with your milf. I was joking about the Susan Boyle comment btw.
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You pole danced in your parka.
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
I'm over here trying to figure out how to get shake shack delivered to my bed and Jamie is having a child
I just found an entire bag of French fries under the seat of my car labeled "For emergency use only" drunk me is always planning ahead.
Randomize