look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
3pm strippers are depressing
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
i ate pretzels. i might be the first human to be hospitalized from pretzels. that's how bad this is.
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
If I hear the phrase 'these unprecedented times' one more time I'm putting my foot up someone's ass.
Randomize
