I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
Yo I'm texting you while getting a bj. I know, I'm the man. Told her I was texting my mom in the hospital.
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
Don't worry, your car is safe with me. I am throwing watermelons out of it at mailboxes and hipster kids.
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
So, I'm stoned at his house petting the neighbors cat I made him steal.
You're a fucking train wreck.
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
Randomize
