Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
You are the only one who would stop a bum, tell him to open up, then pour straight vodka in his mouth. You made his year.
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
Maybe he injected his testicle?
Fuck. What bets did I make about "yeah when the Cubs win the World Series" that I gotta reneg on????
Just stole my moms weed, left a note saying sorry.. Hope she isn't mad.
She threw her burger out the car window last night. My vegan neighbors were not pleased but I’m pretty sure I saw a for sale sign go up on their lawn so I owe her one.
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