things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
I feel like my foot is being amputated. Or maybe it's the vodka. I couldn't tell you.
Why the fuck am I at this dorm meeting? I don't pay $50,000 a year to stay sober.
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
Question: anytime during the past week did I drunk dial you and give you full permission to grab my boobs? Cus I know I said it I just don't remember who I said it to...
Randomize
