I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
You know it's a good weekend when you wake up on Sunday questioning your sexuality.
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
You guys I wore sweatpants to work today because I simply forgot to put on real pants and I had a weed brownie and a juice box for breakfast. I am not ready for parenting.
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
Randomize
