Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
i was rollin on her like bob the builder
her roommate was in the bathroom for over an hour so i volunteered to take the dog out and i shit in the bushes
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
I'm getting drunk by myself again. But I'm not shotgunning any of them. That's self-restraint, right?
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
Randomize
