here I sit at Southern Illinois' finest pubs and I thought I heard your laugh. I was sadly astonished to turn and find a midget cracking herself up reading the label on her can of chewing tobacco...
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
Drunk tip #47: Its better to overestimate how many plastic bottles itll take to urinate in, rather then underestimate.
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
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