Hey guys thanks for lettin me crash at your place for the weekend, I had a great time. PS I got three quarters of a hand job from an asian on the dance floor last night. True story.
So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
I'm drinking keystone with a homeless man I found. It's making me feel uncomfortable.
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
She literally got down on all fours and I swear did a 360 degrees head rotation exorcist barf...and then moaned IT WAS THE TACO BEEEELLLLLL
so no, not her best night
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
They left me at home... I'm a liability
You were so drunk Last night you asked for your glasses so you could read the directions on a band aid
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
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