you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
i am currently wearing a bowl of frosting on my head. i do not regret any of my life choices leading to this moment
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
Randomize
