i wish that high-me and normal-me were two different ppl so that high-me could thank normal-me for setting out a feast before smoking
I wish that high-you wouldn't text me stupid shit at 3:30 in the morning
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
complete strangers are now referring to me as 'the bourbon guy.' i can live with this.
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
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