dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
just tell him i said nine months
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
Actions speak louder than pants.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
I don't know whether to be insulted or flattered that I am being propositioned to have a threesome only if I wear my cat onesie
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
And now, by the power vested in me by the state of intoxication, I now pronounce you fucking awesome.
Ladies night is a gift from god. If it weren't for that, I'd probably be selling my eggs for booze money.
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
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