Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
a garbage man just dropped off my phone and wallet. he found them in the trash this morning.
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
We started telling people we were married, and then we hooked up on a park bench
fact: I now appreciate my drunken winter self even more. I just found $20 in my winter coat with a note that says keep yourself warm next winter. I am awesome.
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
This is what my life has come to. Like, I may or may not have just stolen pizza from the guy I just hooked up with's fridge when I left...
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize
