first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
Need sex. Gaining weight.
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
I woke up this morning with a wristband and I thought I went to the hospital last night I actually went ice skating instead
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
Just text the random number in my iphone notes that was entered at 1am. Should be interesting.
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
your fucking longboard fell on me while we were having sex you fucking hipster
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