East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
I think the only thing that impresses me are nice penises...and Jesus. Jesus would impress me. Especially if he walked on water again.
The only reason I'm still around is so I can grow a huge Gandalf beard when my hair turns gray
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
Also cheers for the reminder to check last night's texts. It's been a magical adventure through drunk me's thought process.
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
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