Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
you were carrying around a glass of vodka telling everyone it was Russian water
I had a dream that chipotle was out of burritos... Was more like a nightmare.. Gotta go make sure it wasn't real now
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
I met this girl the other day and found out her boyfriend is a helicopter pilot. How the fuck do you compete with that.
So hungover im counting my own breaths to make sure im not dead. The odds hurt.
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
I just spent 30 minutes plucking my 2 month grown out pubes with tweezers so I’m hope your night is going better than mine
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