Where did you get a picture of my penis
Screwed.edu
woke up with peach flovored chap stick on my taint ! dont ask why i know it was peach
I forgot how ruthlessly advertising works on me when I'm high.
i just heard one Asian kid say to another, "i bet if i could get into Harvard i could get laid all the time, my brother lost his virginity the first night there."
We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
So much Jack, so little girl.
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
Randomize
