just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
I wake up every morning and wish that I didn't have to wear a bra
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
He felt like a one man threesome
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
On the airplane today the pilot actually said "Ladies and gentlemen I'm sorry for the delay. But I know all of you have problems, and so do we..."
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
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