love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
you washed your face with toilet water last night.. i tried to stop you but you wouldn't have it.
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
THE MIME IS MIMING TO BUST A MOVE KARAOKE. ALL MIME-RELATED EVENTS DESERVE CAPS LOCK
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
Remember those neighbors I thought were FBI agents? Turns out they're DEA.
Randomize
