Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
Did you pee in the oven last night??
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