Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
I knew things were bad when I walked in on you feeding juice to your iPhone
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
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