The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
Randomize
