Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
some girl just asked me how to spell unconscious. I really want to know what she was texting.
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
I think sneezing out coked up boogers onto your professor disqualifies you from the "I was sick" excuse
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
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