yeah so this exboyfriend of yours reckons you're still together and he punched me in the face cos i slept with you last week. you might wanna have a word with him or at a minimum change your facebook status.
What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
Hit a parked car with a "property of Jesus Christ" bumper sticker. Wrote out five hail mary's and left it on the windshield.
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
"Friendship bread", "how to get period stains out of cement", and "elephant bereavement" are all in my recent google history. Whatever shit that was last night really did me in...
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
Accidentally searched up "pizza pasties" instead of "pizza pastries". I was not disappointed.
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
Randomize
