Oh shit. I just had to lure him into the bedroom so I could take the list of his negative qualities off the fridge so he wouldn't see.
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
i just opened a bottle of wine with my dads power tools
I can't figure out how to get this beer bong in my carry on without airport security questioning me as it goes through the x-ray.
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
GOOD NEWS I CAN BRING THE VODKA IN MY LUGGAGE
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
Randomize
