I start off june hungover/still drunk stumbling down my driveway with the trashcan at 6am..it's gonna be an interesting month
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
i called him pencil dick in front of over half of his fraternity brothers...
...never gotten so many high fives in my life! fuck ya i win!
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
I was freaked out. No man over 50 is allowed to touch me. Ever. Unless you're Michael Bolton. Then please do.
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
I'm like a walking PSA for tequila shots
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
Randomize
